1. Don’t try to piss quietly. Nobody in a public restroom thinks you’re knitting in your stall. They came to piss, just like you. And if you have to take a dump, do it. Get over your fear of public toilets. It’ll make life a lot easier.
2. Masturbate. Masturbate a lot. Talk about it with your friends. You’ve got the right to make yourself feel good and brag about it just like all the boys with extra large kleenex packages on their desks.
3. If you want the large fries, get the large fries. Hunger and appetite are nothing to be ashamed of, just human. Don’t ever feel guilty for eating in front of others. You need to nourish your body to stay alive. We all do.
4. Laugh as loud as you have to, no matter if you snort or gasp or literally scream.
5. Fart when you have to.
6. Always remember you weren’t born to visually please others. Forget the phrase “what if they think it’s ugly”. If you think it’s lovely, it is lovely. You wanna wear it, wear it!
7. Speak your mind! You can learn to do so without insulting others or shoving your opinion down other people’s throats."
- Seven Simple Ways To Free Yourself, from girl to girl (via fawnbabe)
women: *are killed, beaten, raped, and put down constantly for hundreds of years just for being women*
woman who is also a feminist: *cracks a joke about men on the internet*
men: ”see this is the problem with feminism it promotes hate speech they’re no better than sexist men why can’t i punch women in the face and why does the guy have to pay on dates #equalitarianism”
WOMEN: please wear high heels unless you don’t know how to walk in high heels in which case stay home and softly gnaw on bottles of shampoo
also please show no less than 64.87% of your boob and no more than 27.94%
stop having arms
when people ask you to smile, blowjob them
my tummy itches make that stop
i will think of new problems for you to have tomorrow
Joss Whedon went to Wesleyan University for film when he was a kid. It’s a fantastic school. and this shit’s fucking awesome.